Men's knitting/crochet group gathers monthly in Northport

John Daniello relaxed in an Adirondack chair at a lake in Pennsylvania on vacation recently, a glass of wine by his side. While his body was still, his hands were in motion — the graphic designer from Huntington was knitting a scarf.

Another man stopped, intrigued. “I’ve never seen a man knitting before,” he said.

That’s not an unusual reaction, men who knit or crochet say. But visit the Northport-East Northport Library branch on Laurel Avenue in Northport on the last Saturday of every month, and you’ll see a collection of men wielding needles and hooks like magic wands, conjuring items out of balls of yarn. Nine men gathered in the library’s outdoor Courtyard Café for the most recent meetup, some who have been knitting or crocheting for decades and others who stitched their first stitch that day.

David Lacagnina, 50, of East Northport, a customer service representative for a credit union, founded the Northport Men’s Knitting & Crochet Meet-Up this spring because whenever he attends a knitting gathering, 99% of the time he said he’s the only male there. “Men are a minority in the knitting community,” he said. “It has become a very women-led hobby. It is very rare when you see one guy knitting, let alone nine guys sitting around a table knitting in public.”

Newcomers to the group are gifted a first set of needles and a skein of yarn to take home so they can continue to practice and learn; experienced participants worked on pillowcases, cardigan sweaters and tapestries, and they lent support to beginners and to each other. “There’s a sense of camaraderie,” said attendee Tim Ging, 68, of Huntington Station. “We joke around a lot. It’s nice to see what other people are working on.”

‘BECOMING MORE MAINSTREAM’

Knitting and crocheting have stereotypically been thought of as hobbies for white-haired grannies, or work for housewives as part of their homemaking chores. But men taking up the yarn craft is “becoming more and more of a mainstream thing ... particularly among younger men,” said Martha Hollander, professor emerita of art history at Hofstra University, who has a knowledge of textile arts.

Men, in fact, were early knitters and crocheters in ancient sailing communities. “They would construct and mend nets when men were at sea ... because there were no women on board those vessels,” Hollander said.

They’d also have to repair their sweaters and socks while away for months at a time, said Cheryl Lavenhar, owner of the Knit yarn store in Roslyn.

Even male Olympic athletes have gotten in on the fun.

U.S. cross-county skier Ben Ogden credited his knitting habit with helping him unwind, which he said paved the way for him this past winter to become the second American man to win a silver medal at the Milan games. And in Tokyo in 2021, British diver Tom Daley went viral for knitting a cardigan while sitting poolside — and credited the hobby for helping him win a gold medal.

Currently, knitting and crocheting groups for men are more often found in bigger metropolitan areas such as Manhattan, Lavenhar said. “In the city it’s a very big thing,” she said. While she does have some male customers who come into her shop to buy yarn, Lavenhar said she doesn’t know of any other organized men’s group on Long Island.

Knitting requires two needles and creates a denser final product than crocheting, which is done with one hook and creates a product with purposeful holes that’s stretchier, Hollander said.

Lacagnina said being able to create something “from string and two sticks” is amazing; he makes baby blankets, fingerless gloves and socks for his husband. “Anything except sweaters,” he said. “They just take so long. Sweaters are too much of a commitment.”

‘FINALLY’

When Ryan Dobbins, 36, a teacher from Ronkonkoma, saw the Northport group meeting promoted on Facebook, he thought, “Finally, a local group,” he said. “I’ve been looking for a community.” He’s been crocheting for two years, currently using a style called Tunisian crocheting and is working on a pillowcase.

He’s made stuffed animals, scarves, blankets, even baseball caps. He also sometimes crochets live on TikTok, urging people to “Take a break from scrolling and crochet with me.”

“It’s both relaxing and stimulating to my brain at the same time,” Dobbins said of needlework. “It’s cool to see a finished project and think, ‘I made that.’ Many people are like, ‘Can you make me something?’ ”

While Lacagnina, who is gay, had initially expected the group to follow another stereotype and primarily attract gay men, that has not been the case, he said. “It’s a very interesting cross-section of guys,” he said. Several men — including Ging — said their wives encouraged them to join the group.

Ging started knitting in college in the 1970s. “My great aunt taught me because I had no money and I wanted to make Christmas gifts for my friends,” Ging said.

Brian Sutch is another whose wife was the catalyst. “I feel like I needed a hobby. I needed to get out of the house once in a while. I have three kids at home, and I needed the stress relief,” said Sutch, 44, a paralegal from East Northport.

What did his 15-year-old think of him joining a knitting group? “He probably wasn’t listening when I told him,” Sutch joked, drawing laughter from the group.

Social media attention and word-of-mouth helped it grow, Lacagnina said, although some of his social media advertisements have drawn online heckling. For instance, a couple of men asked why they aren’t gathering to learn more stereotypical masculine skills, like working on their cars. 

Lacagnina responds with humor.

“All you can do is invite them to join you,” he said. “I even offered to make them a steering wheel cozy.”

‘JUST LIKE THAT ... PERFECT’

Jason Kriloff, 46, of Northport, a steamfitter who works in construction and has a full beard and tattoos, attended his first meeting in August. “Keep your finger on the top of the stich and pull the yarn through,” Lacagnina instructed. “Perfect. Just like that. Pull that stitch off the top of the needle. Perfect. That’s your very first stitch.”

Kriloff said he was drawn to the group because he wanted to meet new friends. “As you get older it seems to be a little bit harder to meet people, good people,” he said.

Daniello — the man who had been knitting at the lake — said newcomers can find the craft challenging. “At first, you get frustrated with it ... ‘I’m never going to get this,’ ” Daniello said. Sometimes he has to rip out lines of work when he realizes he made a mistake. “I had to undo five or six lines. I wasn’t paying attention to what I was doing and made a knot instead of a stitch.”

That brought on a joke from Leo Turner, 22, a barista from East Setauket, who told Daniello that fixing crocheting and knitting errors is called “Frogging.” “Rip it, rip it, rip it,” he said, imitating a frog’s croak.

‘WE DON’T TALK ABOUT THAT’

While starting to knit or crochet doesn’t take an enormous investment — needles and yarn can be purchased for less than $20 total, and newbies can watch free YouTube instructional videos — getting further into the hobby can require more of a commitment both financially and mentally.

Isaac Ellis, 46, of Port Jefferson Station, who works at the Lifelong Learning Institute in Stony Brook, for instance, was working on his third cardigan sweater during a recent meeting.

He picked up knitting during the COVID-19 pandemic as a substitute for his other creative endeavors such as theater that had shut down.

He called knitting a "fantastic creative" outlet — if not a money-saving one. When asked how much it cost to make such a cardigan, he demurred.

“We don’t talk about that. My husband doesn’t need to hear that,” Ellis said. “There’s a meme ... ‘Why buy a sweater for $45 when you can spend $700 to buy all the materials and make it yourself?’ ”